How Can You Possibly Be Republican in 2016?

Hello readers,

Get ready for an incredibly informal roller-coaster ride aboard my political opinions in regards to the incoming presidential election.

Let me get this out right off the bat: the content you’re about to read will not be factual. This is just straight opinions, but I wanna post this because (as the title says) I simply do not understand how anyone could vote Republican in 2016. Thus, in case you are planning on doing so, please enlighten me as to what your logic is. I just…I just HAVE to be missing something, because here’s how I’m looking at this:

In November, people will cast their vote to elect the person they deem most fit as leader of the free world and, well, their choices on the Republican side look just about as good as Ed, Edd, and Eddy.

John Scalzi summed it up perfectly when he wrote, “At this point I can’t even image what it’s like to be a potential GOP voter here in 2016, and knowing that your top three choices for the job of Most Powerful Human Being on the Planet are a racist buffoon, a fumbling empty suit, and The Most Disliked Man in Politics, Ever.”

I think most people with a functioning brain know why they shouldn’t vote for Trump. Same with Cruz, let’s be real, no one likes him. And finally Rubio, I don’t even know man. He seems like the type of guy who would make a PowerPoint with 4 paragraphs of text per slide (and no one, absolutely no one likes that guy).

But here’s the most baffling (by baffling I mean terrifying) thing of all: people out there are actually gonna vote for these guys. Not even that, people out there are actually gonna vote for Trump. BUT PORQUE WHY COMO HOW QUE WHAT DONDE WHEN?!?!

I’ve engaged in several conversations with people who generally consider themselves Republican, and here’s kind of the gist I got from talking to them: “Well, I can’t vote for Bernie, he’s a socialist, and I’m not gonna vote for Clinton because *fill in fundamental ideological difference*, so looks like I’m gonna go with one of those three.”

Did you hear that? That was my jaw dropping to the fucking floor.

Okay so Bernie is out of the question. I get that. He’s too far left for most people to handle. So your next best options are: a woman who’s (in my opinion) a disguised Republican with actual political experience, and three racist imbeciles.

Why in the fucking world would you support anyone but Hillary? It’s like the only sane choice. The fact that she represents the Democratic party should not be a strong enough reason for you to vote for a man who refuses to condemn the KKK or who opens his campaign by claiming that all illegal immigrants are rapists and criminals.

Really? You align so strongly with the GOP that you refuse to vote for anyone else out of principle? It’s okay for your Commander in Chief to be blatantly racist as long as he’s Republican? Why? Is it because if he’s Republican he must be racist for the right reasons?

I just don’t get it, I really don’t get it. Voting Republican in 2016 is like being asked how you feel about the Holocaust and responding, “eeeh, I don’t know I’m kind of on the fence. Apparently it was the Jews’ fault, I’m not sure. But I can’t really support the Americans you know, I have some German family.”

I’m gonna leave it at that for now because I’m getting too angry and there’s no point in me getting angry since I can’t even vote. Green Card game too strong.

I’m so heated, oh my goodness,



3 thoughts on “How Can You Possibly Be Republican in 2016?

  1. I’ll answer. I am a Republican, but I will for the first time vote non-Republican. I’ll vote for Bernie. Hillary should be in prison.

    I am a Republican because of my values, not because of WHO runs.


    1. You SHOULD be Republican because of your values, and you should vote for the person who most closely aligns with those values. So I’m glad you are taking your own advice because I don’t think any of the three candidates I mentioned actually represent Republican beliefs very well. I just wish more people who generally vote Republican would have that realization instead of voting for Trump simply because he’s the biggest swinging set of balls in the race.

      Liked by 1 person

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