Annoying Things That Roommates Do


  1. Are annoying.
  2. Don’t pick up after themselves.
  3. Don’t have a fucking clue about how to complete regular household tasks.
  4. Get butthurt when you don’t invite them to things, but then if you do ask them, they say no.
  5. Don’t take the trash out.
  6. Own an pet.
  7. Own a pet that is annoying as shit.
  8. Don’t clean up after said pet.
  9. Leave said pet’s poop in a plastic bag in the hallway, giving the whole house a nice fragrance of cat shit.
  10. Ask you to go somewhere, and then take forever to get ready.
  11. Leave a milliliter of milk in the jug, but keep the jug in the fridge.
  12. Finish the toilet paper, but don’t put a new roll out.
  13. Leave plates, cups, and pans in the sink, when we clearly have a dishwasher 3 feet away from the fucking sink.
  14. Play video games for hours a time and then complain about their test scores.
  15. Are unable to set things in the dishwasher in an efficient manner, thus filling the entire thing with 3 items.
  16. Forget to pay rent.
  17. Forget to pay you back.
  18. Can’t take a joke.
  19. Don’t clean anything ever, but then complain that the house is dirty.
  20. Eat all the cereal.
  21. Eat all the eggs.
  22. Blast music at 6am to get “hyped” for a final. Seriously?
  23. Move out of the house without telling you.
  24. Number 23 actually happened.
  25. Mooch off of your food.
  26. Invite their own friends over for dinner, but then ask you to cook for them.
  27. Put 3 shirts in the washing machine at a time. Really dude? You’re not wasting water, heat, or electricity at all. Right on!
  28. Decide that they have to introduce you to their friend while you’re taking a shower thus making the first encounter with that person very awkward and very naked.
  29. Clean the kitchen counter by literally putting away every single piece of equipment/appliance in existence. Seriously dude? Why do you have to put the freaking toaster away? We’re all probably gonna need it in 2 hours and its presence on the counter really doesn’t affect anyone nor does it affect the aesthetics of the kitchen. So why tf are you putting the toaster away?
  30. Accumulate as much trash as possible into one bag instead of just taking it out and putting out a new bag.
  31. I’m still looking for the damn toaster.

But regardless of all this, I love them.

As always,



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