Rants

Things That Offend People in 2015

If you have ever experienced a thing, that is a thing, within a bigger complex of things, chances are, that thing has offended someone in 2015.

Seriously, people need to get the spiked bats out of their butts and stop getting so freaking offended at everything.

I’ll give you an example. One time my roommate was listening to Pandora, meaning that he didn’t even have any control over what music he was playing. I, on the other hand, had a song stuck in my head. So, without asking, I took the little speaker he was using and played a song that I really wanted to listen to. Keep in mind that he had not even looked at his phone the whole time or changed any songs for hours.

As soon as I changed the song, he looked at me and went, “Dude, are you serious?” At first I didn’t even have any idea what he was talking about, so I was just jamming out. Then he said, “Are you really just gonna change my music like that?” To which I replied, “Oh wow I’m sorry dude I thought you had it on as background noise I didn’t even think you wer-”

“Nah, it’s alright man, you keep listening. Your true colors are starting to show.”

THIS DUDE TOLD ME MY TRUE COLORS WERE SHOWING AFTER I SWITCHED A FUCKING SONG.

Keep in mind that we were about to leave the house in 2 minutes anyway, so we would have had to turn his music off either way. But I guess my true colors were showing, because he proceeded to not talk to me for the rest of the day.

Now, as childish as that may seem, I’m sure that’s not far off from the things that legitimately offend people these days.

You know another thing that people LOVE getting mad about? High school sports. Yeah, how fucking stupid is that? To all the high schoolers reading this: you won’t give a shit next year! So let it be!

I just recently witnessed twitter beef between Lakeridge kids and Reynolds kids over football…during basketball season. Now I don’t mean to sound condescending, but why exactly are Lakeridge and Reynolds fighting about football? Y’all suck this year. And that’s okay!!!! It’s JUST football. It’s JUST a sport. It’s JUST high school.

I know for a fact I’ll get some people hating on this post. “Why is this fucking college kid hating on us? What the fuck man? Get a life. You went here, have some fucking respect.”

Dude, calm down. I love Lakeridge just as much, if not more, than the next guy. But I’m not going to waste my time over arguing which team sucks the least. And yes! I said Lakeridge football sucks. No, that doesn’t mean that every kid on the Lakeridge football team is an asshole and I don’t have respect for them. They just weren’t very good as a unit this year and their record clearly reflects that.

So if you’re on the Lakeridge football team and you’re reading this (which I doubt that would happen, but who knows) and you have a burning passion to hit me in the face, I got four words for ya: calm the fuck down. Seriously no one is saying anything about you or the content of your character when they say that you weren’t good at football. So just have a good laugh about it and stop worrying so much.

If you can get kicked in the ass all season long, you can damn sure take a joke.

And if the people making the criticism aren’t joking, then just have the peace of mind to know that they are not worth talking to and LET THEM BE.

That applies to everyone in 2015. LET PEOPLE BE. If you hear a joke about something that applies to your life and you don’t react to it, it doesn’t mean that you don’t stand up for yourself or what you believe in. It just means you’re the bigger person! It means you have enough self-respect to know that something a complete stranger might say, cannot affect the pursuit of whatever it is you may be trying to accomplish.

I’ll give you an example because that explanation was a little too abstract. Let’s assume you’re a vegan. And let’s say someone tweets, “I hate food at college so much, I may as well become a vegan since I’m not going to eat anything anyway.”

First of all, that person clearly has no knowledge of what a vegan actually can and can’t eat because it’s not like vegans freaking starve themselves. So just let him be!!! You don’t need to reply all pissed like, “Actually, I’m a vegan and I am extremely offended by that.”

Second of all, dude…just STFU. The vegan community won’t see that you didn’t reply and go, “Darn it, it looks like Bob the Vegan isn’t standing up for our community anymore. We can no longer accept him as one of our own.”

No such thing will ever happen in the history of things. Ever. So just stop. Stop it. Stop what you’re doing. Stop being so pissed at everyone and everything for no reason at all.

Learn to laugh with those who disagree with you, hold hands, and sing the freaking Kumbaya. Seriously, if you go out of your way to get insulted by something, then you deserve it.

I hope this post has offended you. And I hope you do nothing about it. But it’s 2015, so I’ll probably lose 18 followers or something.

As always,

Toodaloo

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